God, I wished I had more patience! Most of us know we would be better served in a lot of situations if we had more patience. One dictionary.com definition of patience is this: an ability or willingness to suppress restlessness or annoyance when confronted with delay. Hmmm. That sounds about right. Since patience is an ability, it stands to reason that with practice we can improve. How?
Most of the time we are restless or annoyed because something isn’t going our way, we want things to happen faster or slower and we stand in judgment of the other person. If we simply try to suppress our discomfort…it will eventually surface. We sound the warning when we say things like…’you are getting on my last nerve’ or ‘my patience is about to run out’. That low grade simmer is still there.
Instead of suppressing our annoyance or restlessness…we’ve got to release it. The practice of patience is the practice of releasing our attachment to the way we think it should be. It is being in discomfort and engaging in the practice of release. How do we release? We learn to accept what is in front of us at this very moment. In essence, practicing patience is being in the moment without judgment, the need to be right and the desire to have it our way.
There is a strategy that helps get me there. When I find myself getting annoyed and restless I take a deep breath and remember that ‘they’ are doing the best they can. The doctor, co-worker, child, friend, parent, partner, sister, brother, stranger, politician. At first, maybe not really believing it and eventually, with practice, becoming sincere.
Could I really believe ‘they’ are really doing the best ‘they’ can…at this moment, in these circumstances, with what little I might really know about ‘their’ life? Practice. Give it a try. Practice toward others and toward yourself. If you want to be more at ease and less stressed, this is the way to go.
P.S I am still practicing
Love
Paula
