Have you ever said this: We don’t discuss religion or politics. Usually said with the intention of keeping the peace…in families and groups of friends. Look where it has gotten us. We have developed a tendency to not discuss anything that makes us uncomfortable and to not listen when others speak about things upon which we disagree.
Here’s another one: Let’s just agree to disagree. If this were actually true we might be getting somewhere. But what it really means is – you stay over there and I’ll stay over here. More to the point it often means – I’m right and you’re wrong so let’s just leave it at that.
We have moved ourselves into our own insular worlds, surrounded ourselves with only like-minded people…not wanting to spend the time or exert the energy to engage with ‘the other’. And when we do engage, too often it is with self-righteousness rather than with curiosity and humility.
This is the point where some say…but why do I have to be the one to show up with humility, why do I have to be the one to listen to understand, why me? My answer is – Why not you? Why not me? Are you interested in healing, in unity, in civil discourse? Does it matter to you that we are able to really talk with each other rather than for conversations to dissolve into raging emotion and hatefulness?
Maybe we should be saying: Let’s keep talking about this. I believe there is common ground in even the most diametrically opposed views. If we can find that, we have a jumping off point for not just agreeing to disagree, but for understanding. It doesn’t mean we need to be less passionate about our beliefs…it just means we can come even just a little bit closer to understanding another point of view.
We are not here to change the world, we are here to express as much love as we possibly can. The elders among us and those who are experiencing their final moments on earth tell us this over and over. Come closer they say, we want to feel the love…that’s what matters most.
With much love
Paula
