Over the last month or so at Spiritual Soul Center I have been sharing that I am more uncertain about life and God and spiritual things that I’ve ever been. I mean if the Divine is a mystery, why would I try to define it or put it in a box? If I really have no control over what happens, only over the reality my mind creates, why would I try to control anything outside of myself? There is so much I don’t know, how could I believe I have it all figured out?
I don’t feel afraid or lost or confused. I feel more free than I ever have! More uncertain and more free. Free to be present and in awe and humble and grateful and curious. What a relief! It’s like a burden lifted. It gives me a chance to see God in everything without explaining or defining it. True freedom.
This quote from Jim Palmer from Notes from Over the Edge captures where I am today.
“The opposite of certainty is not confusion or fear. It’s openness. Curiosity. A willingness to inhabit a life whose possibilities exceed every framework I might use to contain it. The unknown was no longer an emptiness demanding to be filled. It became a space in which life could breathe.”
Yes! I like it! Freedom and space to breathe. To be present, in awe, humble, grateful and curious.
That’s the life I want to live.
Paula
