“As a patient, I realized that someone could treat me but if I didn’t feel they really saw me, that somehow I didn’t feel healed. That emotional space is really where healing occurs.” Dr. Rana Awdish from NPR story by Michelle Andrews
What is emotional space? Emotional space is the “I hear you” space. It is not necessarily the “I agree with you space”. Real communication happens in emotional space…listening and responding with kindness, respect and acknowledgement. Emotional space is not dominated by my perspective only, but is open to question and possibility. Emotional space is, ironically, not emotional at all…in the out of control emotion we tend to think of. This healing space springs from calm centeredness. It is the space between us guided by the heart, the center of love. Emotional space is love space…and that is where healing takes place.
If you desire a healing between yourself and another…consider creating this emotional space. Consider real communication, calm centeredness and a different possibility. It may take a while or you may experience a healing right away.
Here are a few tips to get you started.
1. Practice seeing the other person as an individual with the desire for love, acceptance, peace and happiness…just like you. What if it was true that we all really want the same things?
2. Notice your language, especially around children, the elderly, those in physical or emotional pain. Notice too how you speak to your partner, family members and people at work. Do your words convey hope and possibility? Are they grounded in calm centeredness?
3. Have a conversation with someone you disagree with. Talk, don’t judge. Open up some space, don’t start with an attitude. Listen, find the common ground. You don’t have to agree, but you can be kind.
In Matthew 5: 42-48 Jesus said…it’s easy to love the people who love you, that’s not such a big deal. The real work is in loving those who are different, frustrating, challenging…those who think and act differently. This is our spiritual work. Are you game?
With much love
Paula
